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Enkil's Four Steps to Colonizing Space
Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 9:00 am
by Enkil
1) Go to the moon, colonize it. Hope Cthulhu doesn’t follow.
2) Go to Mars. Hire a Space Marine to kill the demons, ala DOOM. Take coffee break.
3) Go to Europa. Set a legion of Eskimos loose on the surface to make buildings. Afterwards, kill them for food and warmth.
4) Wash, rise, repeat.
Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 10:47 am
by decadence
LMFAO
Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 11:34 am
by JJ Burke
disposable eskimos? why aren't you working for nasa?!
Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 12:30 pm
by Enkil
They won't pay me enough.
Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 1:27 pm
by Jesus Prime
But there's no such thing as Eskimoes!
Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 2:06 pm
by Enkil
You have two eyes but cannot see!
Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 3:14 pm
by Eternities End
Dude Eskimoes arn't just gonna work like slaves...Trust me I hired a bunch of those assholes before to make me a snow igloo and they did a half assed job
Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 5:09 pm
by Jesus Prime
Because they aren't real!
Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 6:32 pm
by JJ Burke
i think it goes without saying that these eskimos will be infused with water bear dna for cheap and effective anhydrobiostasis during the long space voyages
i mean come on, like duh
Re: Enkil's Four Steps to Colonizing Space
Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:53 pm
by E.A. Lovecraft
Enkil wrote:1) Go to the moon, colonize it. Hope Cthulhu doesn’t follow.
2) Go to Mars. Hire a Space Marine to kill the demons, ala DOOM. Take coffee break.
3) Go to Europa. Set a legion of Eskimos loose on the surface to make buildings. Afterwards, kill them for food and warmth.
4) Wash, rise, repeat.
Hope Cthulhu doesn’t follow should probably be added to the end of each step.
Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 12:13 am
by Hodgson
Jesus Prime wrote:Because they aren't real!
Nah, Eskimos are real. You're thinking of leprechauns. Or gnomes. Or Canadians.
Re: Enkil's Four Steps to Colonizing Space
Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 12:59 pm
by Enkil
E.A. Lovecraft wrote:Enkil wrote:1) Go to the moon, colonize it. Hope Cthulhu doesn’t follow.
2) Go to Mars. Hire a Space Marine to kill the demons, ala DOOM. Take coffee break.
3) Go to Europa. Set a legion of Eskimos loose on the surface to make buildings. Afterwards, kill them for food and warmth.
4) Wash, rise, repeat.
Hope Cthulhu doesn’t follow should probably be added to the end of each step.
Hmm you're right. But at Europa it should probably be more, "Hope the Gate isn't open."
Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 2:22 pm
by Eternities End
Hodgson wrote:Jesus Prime wrote:Because they aren't real!
Nah, Eskimos are real. You're thinking of leprechauns. Or gnomes. Or Canadians.
You son of as bitch!
Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 2:51 pm
by decadence
Eternities End wrote:Hodgson wrote:Jesus Prime wrote:Because they aren't real!
Nah, Eskimos are real. You're thinking of leprechauns. Or gnomes. Or Canadians.
You son of as bitch!
sons (it's plural)
Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 5:13 pm
by Jesus Prime
Hodgson wrote:Jesus Prime wrote:Because they aren't real!
Nah, Eskimos are real. You're thinking of leprechauns. Or gnomes. Or Canadians.
I have met all of those, but never an Eskimo. So I remain unconvinced.