Lovecraftian School Board Member Wants Madness Added To C...

Enkil · Post by **Enkil** » Mon Mar 02, 2009 9:18 pm

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/lo ... ard_member

ARKHAM, MA—Arguing that students should return to the fundamentals taught in the Pnakotic Manuscripts and the Necronomicon in order to develop the skills they need to be driven to the very edge of sanity, Arkham school board member Charles West continued to advance his pro-madness agenda at the district's monthly meeting Tuesday.

"Fools!" said West, his clenched fist striking the lectern before him. "We must prepare today's youth for a world whose terrors are etched upon ancient clay tablets recounting the fever-dreams of the other gods—not fill their heads with such trivia as math and English. Our graduates need to know about those who lie beneath the earth, waiting until the stars align so they can return to their rightful place as our masters and wage war against the Elder Things and the shoggoths!"

The controversial school board member reportedly interrupted a heated discussion about adding fresh fruit to school lunches in order to bring his motion to the table. With the aid of a flip chart, West laid out his six-point plan for increased madness, which included field trips to the medieval metaphysics department at Miskatonic University, instruction in the incantations of Yog-Sothoth, and a walkathon sponsored by local businesses to raise money for the freshman basketball program.

lovecraft518 · Post by **lovecraft518** » Wed Mar 04, 2009 7:54 pm

Lol!
That's great

Eternities End · Post by **Eternities End** » Wed Mar 04, 2009 8:14 pm

bahaha hilarious

Eliza · Post by **Eliza** » Thu Mar 05, 2009 1:07 am

Oh, that's great.

tsathoggua · Post by **tsathoggua** » Mon Mar 30, 2009 5:49 pm

BTW google image search hello cthulhu

lovecraft518 · Post by **lovecraft518** » Mon Mar 30, 2009 11:15 pm

My backpack has hello cthulhu on it :D
The one with the dress and bowtie.
And it has Cthulhu F'tagn and the like written all over it.
People stare at me lol

tsathoggua · Post by **tsathoggua** » Wed Apr 01, 2009 5:25 pm

OMFG that is megaminttantastifying i want a hello cthulhu backpack

lovecraft518 · Post by **lovecraft518** » Wed Apr 01, 2009 11:04 pm

Its yellow, too :D
cafepress.com
look up cthulhu

TheEdge · Post by **TheEdge** » Thu Apr 02, 2009 9:45 am

Nice.....!

lovecraft518 · Post by **lovecraft518** » Thu Apr 02, 2009 11:38 am

tsathoggua · Post by **tsathoggua** » Mon Apr 06, 2009 8:06 pm

Also :D