"Norris Is Le Chuck"

decadence · Post by **decadence** » Mon Dec 11, 2006 8:09 am

I found a page of arcticles written by Chuck Norris. Like actual, serious stuff.
This is some funny shit! He is apparently a columnist!

http://70.85.195.205/news/archives.asp?AUTHOR_ID=274

And then, listen to what happens when you load this. I laughed so hard I literally pissed on myself in my chair

http://www.chucknorris.com

LMFAO

If you somehow missed the entire internet sub culture of Chuck Norris jokes, the man is the most shameless, wooden, cardboard cutout actor that ever was ...well cut out of cardboard! He takes himself so..seriously.

I mean ...its....hes CRAZY!

"hi im chuck norris"

I'll admit, I watched walker, (anyone who claims they didnt is lying to protect their image) but cmon, the man is a complete piece of cordwood!

Come on, you know you've seen his show, Walker, and you cannot escape that. You might not have KEPT UP, but you know you've seen it, and thats what makes the man so funny to me. He cannot act his way out of a paper bag, but he won't go away. It is like crabs. They keep reappearing on a crotch someplace!

Jesus Prime · Post by **Jesus Prime** » Mon Dec 11, 2006 1:29 pm

I actually haven't seen Walker but only because it's never on teevee here. I'm more ashamed to say I haven't seen it than I would be to say I had.
However, I love the Chuck Norris facts.

Eternities End · Post by **Eternities End** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 3:11 pm

What the shit! You've never seen Chuck in his most awsome of roles

odin2 · Post by **odin2** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 3:27 pm

MONKEYS! THEY HAVE TAILS! HOLY SHIT!

E.A. Lovecraft · Post by **E.A. Lovecraft** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:55 pm

When did you discover yours?

Jesus Prime · Post by **Jesus Prime** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 5:15 pm

Yesterday.

E.A. Lovecraft · Post by **E.A. Lovecraft** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 11:42 am

Well, that explains the poo-flinging tendencies.

Jesus Prime · Post by **Jesus Prime** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 4:21 pm

I'm not so sure. He doesn't have the instinctive aim.

Yog-Sothoth · Post by **Yog-Sothoth** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 5:18 pm

HE'S COMIN FOR YOU!!!

Jesus Prime · Post by **Jesus Prime** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 7:00 pm

ALL HOPE IS LOST!

decadence · Post by **decadence** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 8:06 pm

Eternities End · Post by **Eternities End** » Fri Dec 15, 2006 2:31 pm

Holy Shit...Those guns look way to small compared to hiss massive arms

odin2 · Post by **odin2** » Sat Dec 16, 2006 10:04 am

RUN AWAY!!

Jesus Prime · Post by **Jesus Prime** » Sat Dec 16, 2006 1:28 pm

Eternities End wrote:Holy Shit...Those guns look way to small compared to hiss massive arms

He actually uses them like boxing gloves, because being shot with a gun is less damaging than being punched by a bare-fisted Chuck Norris.

Eternities End · Post by **Eternities End** » Sun Dec 17, 2006 3:37 pm

anyone ever see the ultimate showdown flash?
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/285267

Chuck totally kicks the shit out of Harrison Ford