Well, last night we had a visitation from bizzaro-Joseph!!! It was a completely enlightening experience, and I felt moved to share these mighty words of wisdom with anyone who might be interested.
Unfortunately his lordship was knocked cold, and kept unconscious for part of his stay, as Wisteria was unsure what to do with him. When Nyarly showed up, he was given an annoying flag, and could not spread his joy over the channels as he longed to do.
However, he apparently gained access to Jospehs IM accounts as well, and spoke the words there for any who was on his list to hear. Nat, the quick thinker that she is, felt moved to preserve his words for all to hear, and upon reading, I felt moved to share them with any and all that might seek enlightenment.
So, without further ado, here is the wisdom. May your heart be opened to the message, and may joy fill your entire being. Be on the lookout for a visitation from bizarro-jospeh to a pulpit near you!! And remember, "say you can't stop the power of pwnship", brethren.
- Edward, now.
Never give out your password or credit card number in an instant message conversation.
Natalie says:
Hey.
pete says:
joseph FTW
pete says:
fuck all youall
pete says:
this joseph
Natalie says:
Dumb question: Why vent to us, when you can confront him in person?
pete says:
and jopseph sez fuckyall!
pete says:
say this me
pete says:
say and we hold veritable questionablization
pete says:
say all y'all cthuluans go fuck yeselves
pete says:
say this be Joseph
pete says:
say and jo be saying go fuck yeselves
pete says:
say Jo be laughin'
pete says:
say so go to hell ye bastards
pete says:
say kill joseph, cause he hates ye
pete says:
say ye fat bitch
Natalie says:
Nice try. Hell doesn't scare us. We know of places even darker and horrific than hell.
pete says:
say hahaHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
pete says:
say kill Joseph!!!!!
pete says:
say he want's to die cause of ya!!!!!
Natalie says:
"Fat bitch," eh? Well, you're half right. I leave it to you which half you are right about.
pete says:
say still logged on about, they all want to kill me
pete says:
say he says' FU&CK YU
pete says:
say i pwn his password
pete says:
say you can't stop the power of pwnship
pete says:
say he hates you, an yew knoe why!!!
pete says:
say hahAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
pete says:
say yeew cannot stop me, i have complete control of the keyboard
pete says:
say he'll believe me when he wakes up
pete says:
say and he'll hate yew
pete says:
say pwned!
pete says:
say muhahahahaAAAAAAA
pete says:
say beat that BITCH!
pete says:
hehehe
pete says:
say i thought so
pete says:
say stay away from my cousin!
pete says:
say he's better than yew
pete says:
say he'll never know unless i let him
Natalie says:
Cousin?
pete says:
say he liked yew untill i convinced him otherwiszer
pete says:
say haw haw hw HAWHAWHAW
pete says:
say he tried
pete says:
say he took =half his id number and half his unit for his password
Natalie says:
Oh, why did you dissuade him from chatting with me? What do you have against me?
pete says:
say but i knew both
pete says:
say he sent me picture
pete says:
say i's gotta stop him from lovin an uglee bitch like yew
pete says:
say hahaha HAWHAWHAWHAW
Natalie says:
Your puny attempts at getting me upset are falling on deaf ears. Try again.
pete says:
say go ahead
pete says:
say try to convince him this didn't take place
pete says:
say try to convinve him yew didn't sto likin himn!!!!!
pete says:
say he'll never figure out i go this passwordsz
pete says:
oo hahahHAWHAWHAWHAZWHAWHAW
pete says:
he even loved yew i think
pete says:
say but you'll never convivehim after i get to him haw HAAAAAA
Natalie says:
Like I'm going to run away and never speak to him again about this. Like his Cthulhumud friends won't tell him about this trangsgression?
pete says:
say my Cuz iz better than yew!
pete says:
say you'll never get him!
Natalie says:
And a thousand times better than you, sirrah! A better man would bring this up in person instead of doing some passive-agressive hacking.
Natalie says:
L33t is annoyting.
pete says:
say hackinjg?
pete says:
say if my cuz were better than mudsz then i wuldn;'t have to do this EH?
Natalie says:
Define "better."
pete says:
say he's gonna wonder why he's dying of dehydration until i tell him of the bitches that are tryihg to kill him
pete says:
then he'll go somewhere else
pete says:
say hawhaw hawHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAW
Natalie says:
He'll understand once everyone explains why what happened did. Then he'll be taking it up with you, so joke's on you.
pete says:
say you don't even know his password!!!!
Natalie says:
And you do. Lovely. He should disown you for this crime.
pete says:
say you don';t know
pete says:
say he only lets family know his passwords
pete says:
say cause theyre all usefull on his total accounts
pete says:
say so fuck yew!!!!
Natalie says:
Apparently that trust, however understandable, is misguided in your case.
pete says:
say if i sstay online long enough they'll kill my cthulu account
pete says:
say and he'll blame yew!!
pete says:
say hawhawhawHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAW!
Natalie says:
A Bond villian . . . you ain't.
Natalie says:
Accounts are not killed that easily, not with a long-standing account as he has.
pete says:
say not way
pete says:
say i can do so
pete says:
say they'll kill me if they give me time to offend
Natalie says:
I've seen accounts deleted for annoying behavior, but only when the player is like, minutes old.
pete says:
hawhawHAWHAWHAW
pete says:
say i'm Joseph
pete says:
say i can annoy anyone!!!!!
pete says:
say heh they can stun me
pete says:
sat but i can always logg on
pete says:
say cause i know joe's password
pete says:
say i know why joe's password is as it is
pete says:
say i can read the code!!!!
pete says:
say fuck jo and fuck yew!!!
Natalie says:
Joseph is not annoying. He's a fascinating guy. We all know that on the MUD.
pete says:
say joe's gay
pete says:
say that's why he hasn't talked to yew in a long while!!!
Natalie says:
So, that whole "I'm off on a farm" thing was a ruse?
pete says:
say wtf yew saying?
pete says:
say i'm not onna farm
pete says:
say i'm joeseph!
Natalie says:
Oh, really, Mr. Shaman? Talk to me about totems, then.
pete says:
say joseph FTW
pete says:
say fuck totems
pete says:
say totems suck!!
pete says:
say totems don't exist!!!!
pete says:
say anyone who believes in totems or ghosts smmfass
pete says:
say hawhawHAWHAWHAWHAWHWHAW
pete says:
haw h awhaw
pete says:
say tyry to email him
pete says:
say i got his email forwardeed!!!!!
Natalie says:
To where? Timbuktu?
pete says:
say LeeT hacker FTW
pete says:
say he'll never know that i been talking
pete says:
say Leet hacker FTW
Natalie says:
When will he wake up?
pete says:
hahaHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAW
pete says:
say NEVER!!!
pete says:
say he'll log onto his mudsz and be DEAD!!!!!!
Natalie says:
No, in real life, doofus. When does he wake up in the mornings?
pete says:
NEFVER BICH!
Natalie says:
Or do you even know of this "real life?"
pete says:
say yar
pete says:
say i'm his favourite cousin
pete says:
say i'll be his favourite whatever yew say!!!!!!!
Natalie says:
Favorite psycho cousin, sure.
pete says:
say family bitch
pete says:
say try to combat that!
pete says:
say hawhawHAWHAWHAWHAWHAW
Natalie says:
You can't choose your family, true, but the friends you do choose are priceless.
pete says:
fuck yew
pete says:
say divorce mne bitch!
pete says:
say yer ugly, i've seen the pictures
pete says:
hawhawHAWHAWHAWHAZWHAW
pete says:
say they cabn block me on the MUD
pete says:
say but when jo logs back on he;s in for a very RUDE GREETING!!!!!!
Natalie says:
My soul is prettier than yours, you stupid Leet hacker.
pete says:
say then what's my name biotch?!?!?!?!
Natalie says:
Pete's idiot hacker cousin.
pete says:
haw haw
pete says:
say like you could ever convince th mud that's what
pete says:
say he'll never be allowed back there
pete says:
say he'll have to find another place to play!!!!1
Natalie says:
And then you'll jump on his butt for not paying his bills on time again. Will you do this same thing then, as well?
pete says:
hawhawHAWHAWHAW
pete says:
say firever you'll be thingink if it's him or ME
pete says:
say hawHAWHAWHAZW
pete says:
FTW
Natalie says:
No, he types better than you, doofus.
pete says:
hawhawHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAWHAW
Natalie says:
You'll split your sides with all that hysterical laughter.
pete says:
YES
pete says:
they deleted Joseph!!
pete says:
say there is no Joseph, only Zuul!!!
pete says:
beat that Bitch!!
Natalie says:
I take that that was on another mud?
pete says:
nope
pete says:
oon cthulumud
pete says:
say the only mud Joseph plays
pete says:
say joseph is dead!!!
Natalie says:
Too bad. Looks like you won.
pete says:
hawhawHAWHAWHAW
pete says:
say pete'll never understand what hapoppened
pete says:
say and with proper prompting, he'll blame YEW!
pete says:
say i rool!!
pete says:
say me FTW
Natalie says:
And the world F's you back.
pete says:
say hawhawHAWHAWHAW
pete says:
say he'll try to log on, anmd won't be abl;e to!!!
pete says:
say and who do you think he'll blame?
pete says:
say not me\
Natalie says:
We'll see about that.
pete says:
say riiiiight
pete says:
say he don';t exist
pete says:
say who do you think he'll blame
pete says:
say i don't even know where he plays to his knowledge
pete says:
say he's tried to get me to join, but no go!
pete says:
say me FTW!!!!
pete says:
say WoW ftw!
Natalie says:
Yeah, we'd love to have someone of your obvious maturity on board.
pete says:
say you'l;d have to convince teh gods that i'm not me
pete says:
say and it aint gonna happen
pete says:
say say goodbye to Joseph
pete says:
say i win!!!!
Natalie says:
So, you've outwitted us all. Congratulations.
pete says:
say hawhawHAWHAWHAWHAWHWA
Natalie says:
Just for the record, how old are you, you criminal mastermind, you?
pete says:
say i'm the SMART cousin]
pete says:
say how old do you think i am?
Natalie says:
A dumb 15.
pete says:
say pete told me about yew, but i though yew were too ugly to date him!!!
pete says:
say and i wuz right!!
pete says:
say cthulu abandoned him, yew will too
pete says:
say and he'll be down to forumsz on adultswim
pete says:
say haw haw haw HAWHAWHAW
pete says:
say I WIN!
pete says:
say joseph's dead!
pete says:
say dead and buried!
Natalie says:
Congrats, genius.
Natalie says:
*yawn*
pete says:
say lol
pete says:
say try to beat me then bitch
Natalie says:
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to get some shuteye.
pete says:
say no mo jo
pete says:
say jo no mo!
pete says:
say and he'll never believe you!!
Natalie says:
Farewell, Pete's hacker cousin. I hope he goes easy on you when he figures out what you did.
pete says:
say he'll only know that he's deleted, anmd yew were the last to talk with him
pete says:
say so he'll HATE yeww
pete says:
say hate hate HATREHATEHATE
pete says:
say rofl
pete says:
say he actually liked yew even
pete says:
say he sent me yer picture
Natalie says:
No, he'll greet me with LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE.
Natalie says:
Laters, you pwn!
pete says:
say he said he'd met someone online factor 1/10000000
pete says:
say but after the email i send
pete says:
say he'll blame yew for the deletion of his only mud character
pete says:
say haw haw haw HAWHAWHAWHAWHAW
For those that missed the wonder and joy last nite.
Moderators: mgmirkin, Bast, Quanqued, Moderators
